KAYYTEE

Millennials state of kind.

  • Carrie: Oh, you read the third book in the series?
  • Hannah: No. Obviously I looked it up online.
What is it with my cousin? She still has a nose ring, is so fat, and gave herself diabetes from eating candy.

—Carolyn

I don’t think he is that cute. He wears a necklace and I’m automatically repulsed.

—Allie

Smile, darling.

Smile, darling.

G-Eazy for the win. Thanks, Gerald.

G-Eazy for the win. Thanks, Gerald.

  • Deana: I only want a child that comes out of a womb potty trained.
  • Livers: That's called adoption.
Spring is mating season. Everyone is coupling off.

—Reed

Up, up & away!

Up, up & away!

I went to the police to tell them my phone was stolen, but turns out 3 people broke out of jail that day so my phone was not a priority.

Sara

Excerpt from one of the best stories I’ve heard in a while